Category Archives: interesting interwebs

just eyeball it

You’re gonna love this new teen trend: pouring vodka directly onto your eyeball. The Daily Mail reported on the phenomenon a couple of weeks ago, and now it’s catching on in America, according to a scary report on CBS2. But why? CBS2 doesn’t actually have any attributable quotes in their segment, but they watched a lot of the YouTube videos and report that “the pain gives way to an instant high and then a deeper state of drunkenness.” [via gothamist]

Vodka Eyeballing (I stole this photo, but so did Gothamist)SERIOUSLY? Where did this come from? Well, Britain…but more specifically – what inspired someone to put vodka IN HIS EYE? Possible answers:

  1. A man promises his wife: “I will go to the pub, but I won’t drink.”
  2. A woman asks, “how much Vodka should I put in my tea?” Her friend replies, “I don’t bloody know, just eyeball it.”

Once in a while the headlines are dominated by concerns about binge drinking – new studies will come out that conveniently support the sponsoring organization’s message and we’ll search high and low for someone other than Johnny to blame for his [insert negative experience here]. Here we go again.

I should point out that “binge drinking” in the US refers to underage drinking (adults don’t binge, we network). American culture celebrates the pastime as if it were the new millennium’s answer to roller disco. Wait…it’s not new? The movie Animal House came out in 1978 (which happens to be six years before the National Minimum Drinking Age Act of 1984).

Don’t waste your time reading scientific research on the matter, grab a cold one and turn on the TV. Channel surf until you land on a picture of Snooki getting punched in the face, but keep flipping past Intervention. Open a magazine to pictures of hot mess Lindsay Lohan or jam out to LMFAO’s song “Shots”on your iPod.

If you ain’t getting drunk get the $%&@ out the club / If you ain’t taking shots get the $%&@ out the club / If you ain’t come to party get the $%&@ out the club / Now where my alcoholics let me see yo hands up / What you drinkin on? / Jaeger bombs, lemon drops / Buttery nipples, jello shots / Kamikaze, three wise men / $%&@ed on that $%&@, get me some gin Shots

Side note – I hate Lil’ Wayne. YEEEEE-AH.

Yes, underage/binge drinking is a problem. Unfortunately it’s impossible to tell whether pop culture is the chicken or the egg.

Americans (especially the under-21 set) love to proclaim, “If you’re old enough to vote and to die for your country you are old enough to enjoy a beer.” So is lowering the age from 21 to 18 going to reduce the ratio of keg stands to football parties? The logic never quite made sense. But in case you were on the bandwagon, consider this: in the UK children age 5 and over may legally consume alcohol in their own or someone else’s home as long as they have permission from an adult.

And then they put Vodka in their eyeballs.

I’ve been an underage drinker, a fake ID carrier, a hide-in-the-bathroom-until-the-cops-leave-the-bar aficionado, and an expert at flirting with bouncers who questioned whether I was a 30 year old 5’2″ blond named Crystal (I’m not).  I’ve complained about the drinking age over many an illegally purchased beverage and begrudgingly paid a fine when I got caught. I’ve binged on more than one occasion and made some bad decisions.  I take responsibility for all of them and I can say with absolute certainty that a change in the law would not have meant a change in my behaviour (for the better, at least).  But hey, at least I never put Vodka in my eyeball.

On a serious note: everyone has been negatively affected by alcohol in some way, be it us personally or our loved ones- be it alcoholism, drunk driving, or just plain bad decisions.  I don’t mean to minimize the issue.

I highly recommend the memoir, “Smashed: Story of a Drunken Girlhood” by Koren Zailckas.  Most everyone will relate to some aspect of her story.  I admire the courage and honesty with which she tells her story of becoming addicted to alcohol as a young girl and her struggles thereafter.